From Productivity to Presence

Written By Desiree Mensah

We’ve officially finished the first quarter of the year!

For my fellow "Type A" personalities, this milestone can be a bit of a double-edged sword. It’s tempting to look back and only recall the tasks left unfinished, the goals not executed perfectly, or the wins we’ve already minimized. We tend to measure our worth by our crossed-off to-do list rather than the quality of our internal peace.

Before we rush into the next ninety days, let's take a moment to reflect on where we’ve actually been. 

A Gentle Disclaimer

Before you dive into the questions below, a quick disclaimer: If these questions spark a sense of "I need to do this reflection perfectly," take a breath. You don’t need to answer all of them. You don’t need to write a thesis. If you only sit with one question that resonates, you’ve done the work. The goal is not to add another "task" to your plate.

Resentment Compass: Resentment is often a "check engine" light for a boundary that needs to be set.

  • Where did you feel the most resentment this quarter? What boundary was being crossed, and what unmet need was that resentment trying to protect?

  • Where did you say 'yes' simply because you felt it was your responsibility to keep the peace, and what did that 'yes' cost your nervous system?

The Found Self Goals (Self-Connection): 

  • Where did I feel the most pressure to be perfect this quarter?

  • When the weather kept you indoors, did your home feel like a sanctuary or a pressure cooker for your internal self-critic?

  • Outside of your roles (professional, caregiver, friend), what was one activity this quarter that made you feel most like you?

  • Without the distractions of outdoor activities or social events, what did you discover about your ability (or struggle) to be alone with your own needs?

  • Did you find yourself suppressing your emotions (anger, sadness, loneliness)?

  • Did the 'less contact' with friends feel like a lonely burden, or did you notice a secret sense of relief because you didn’t have to perform or accommodate anyone?

  • In the absence of 'fun' distractions, did you find yourself over-working or over-cleaning to justify your existence during the darker months?"

Moving into Quarter Two

Spring brings warmer weather (hopefully soon), and natural regrowth. In the next three months 

  • What are some boundaries that need to be reevaluated? 

  • Set a goal to give one "Slow No" per week (e.g., "Let me check my capacity and get back to you") to practice sitting with the discomfort of potentially disappointing others.

  • How can you intentionally create "glimmers" for yourself—micro-moments of rest, play, or silence?

  • What’s a vulnerable thought you could share with a loved one? 

  • If you were to share one vulnerable, non-functional thought with a friend (e.g., "I've actually been feeling quite lonely lately") without trying to fix their reaction.


Which of these questions hits home for you today? Let’s chat in the comments—I’d love to hear which reflection gave you the most insight.

Desiree Mensah